Forgive Me
Chapter One: I Heard His Cry

“Aimo, aimo, ne-deru ru-she,...”
I remember the pain surging through my veins. I was singing, but I don't remember for how long.

“Noina miria enderu pourodea,...”
Time froze. The fearless toddler in my arms reaches out for the loose stands of my hair, as if reaching out to my song.

“...fotomi,...”
The unbearable moment came. The tears begin to fall. I look down into the eyes of this innocent yet beautiful child that I held tight to my chest. The little girl's mother, trembling on her knees, reaches out for her child with both arms extended.

“Ranka,...” The demon growled, grasping the grass feverishly like a rabid animal.

I step back. “Don't come any closer!!” The words slip through my lips as the girl begins to cry, matching my own misery.

The battered woman reaches up only harder, her voice escalating. “Don't you recognize me, Ranka-chan?”

She scratches my legs deep, snarling like a demon. She forcefully grabs the hem of my dress, causing me to fall backwards. The tearful girl I held in my arms is forced forward onto the patch of grass before the disheveled woman.

“Kaede!” The blood begins to drip, slowly cascading down my legs. As much determination as I have, I could not summon anymore strength to reach out for her.

With a smile on her face, Kaede crawls into the arms of her mother. “Mama!”

The mother's eyes soften instantly. “My sweetheart,...” Looking down, she kisses her little girl on the cheek, wiping her tears away softly. “Mommy's back. Mommy missed you very much.”

“Kae-chan missed you too, mama!” Kaede replies cheerfully.

“Kaede!” I yell again. But my yelling and screaming isn't enough... “Get away from her! That's not mommy!”

“Am I going to lose her too?”
Another tear falls down my cheek.

“Am I going to lose my little niece?”
I close my eyes, folding my legs into my chest and holding them tightly.

“Alto... Alto-kun...”

A piercing scream.
Blood splatters onto my dress.
The cry of a man in pain rings throughout my mind...

I opened my eyes to a dark and silent room. I was in my bed, catching myself in this nightmare once again. Every night ever since that day I've been having the same reoccurring dream. Every single moment detailed to the core.

No matter how I would cry out for him, Alto could not hear my fears. He could not hear my anguish, my pain, or my suffering. But why should I drown him in my pain when he had enough to deal with on his side? He saw his wife die right in front of his eyes.

I sighed and turned over on my side, taking in the stillness of my room. “Things are better now... Why am I still living in that moment?”

I knew everything wasn't all right no matter how many times I've tried to convince myself. The Vajra demons from those times are still alive and well at night. Frontier lost many people that year.

“Aunt Emi.”

I look over to the little girl laying beside me. She looks up at me with her bright, wide, amber-colored eyes, confused by the solemn look on my face. “You look sad. What's wrong?”

I crack a smile at her and give her a soft tap on the nose. “Nothing, Kae-chan. Go back to sleep so I don't get yelled at by your Otou-san again.”

She gives me a little nod and quietly rests her head back down, closing her eyes.

Come to think of it, Kaede is six now. About three years have passed since the day her mother died. She does not remember her. To make up for it, I try to be the best mother I can be to Kaede. I'm sure that is what her mother would have wanted.

She lives with her father at a house near the river. I come at least once a week to make sure she continues learning and having fun. Kaede is a very bright young girl, and takes after Alto so much. In fact, she looks just like him: the poker straight, dark blue hair, and those brilliant, amber colored eyes. It's always very comforting to see her smile -- it makes my darkest days so much brighter. And despite all that has happened to us, and what fate has tested us with, she is the strongest warrior I have ever known.

I look up past Kaede and to the table beside my bed. There stands a picture of me, Alto, and Kaede on one of our trips to Okinawa. We like to go there often because Alto and Kaede enjoy fishing together. It's a hobby that Alto took up himself after the war and when he took a break from being a pilot.

It's very difficult to raise someone in a time of pain and suffering, and that is why I look up to Alto as well. He took care of Kaede and I after the war when he was in pain himself. Even though he would not show it in front of anyone, there would be times where I would wake up early in the morning just to see him stare into his reflection in the river. I always wonder what he was thinking of. Maybe her... the way she stood strong, the way she encouraged all of us to be our best, and most importantly, the way she loved.

Then... I heard a piercing scream.
And the blood splattered onto my dress,
As I made out the cry of a man in pain...
And it continuously rings throughout my mind...